A month ago today, we loaded up the U-haul and headed out of town...again. This time it was only three hours north instead of twenty-four, but it was not much easier to say the least. This past year Scott and I have moved four times. While I have gotten the packing and unpacking down to a science, it does not make the actual move any less difficult.
The unfamiliar is something I am not always good with. Yes, I enjoy adventure. I enjoy traveling-seeing new places and meeting new people. However, I always enjoy it when I can come back home and stay for a while. However, the past year, I have found myself going more than staying. I suppose God knows what He is doing, but it would be nice to buy a house, settle down in one location, and then do some traveling.
You see-I have felt as if I have lived out of a box the past 8 years of my life. I packed up my car and moved into a dorm at Baylor University. Then I packed and moved to Virginia for law school. Then I packed up and moved back to Texas, this time with a husband. And now, we packed up and headed north on I-35 to a little town I like to call Fort Worth.
There is a pattern in moving-each time. You go through your stuff, pack it in boxes and put it on a U-haul trailer. (In my experience, the U-haul gets bigger every time despite how much stuff I throw away.) The pattern continues: once the U-haul is packed, you say your goodbyes, cry your tears, and set out on your adventure. Then there are the relationships you have to leave behind. For me, it is never easy to leave my family behind, no matter how far or short the distance.......
Growing up in a very tight knit family, you can imagine my dismay when I went to college-I was excited for the new adventure, but nervous and sad about leaving my mom, dad, and sisters behind. So, my senior year of high school, I began to pray for a few girlfriends to help make that transition better. What I got was was three...or six fold. When I graduated from Baylor, I had to leave my posse. These girls were my Waco family for four years-we did everything together during our time at Baylor, including living in a house together. When we graduated, we all had a period of grieving when we did not see each other all day, everyday.
When I arrived in Virginia, I was surprised to find such great friends in such a short amount of time. It took less than 6 weeks for me to feel like my friends were not just friends, but family. While they did not replace my friends and family back in Texas, they showed me what true community is. They are all beautiful souls, whom we loved seeing every day, enjoyed breaking bread together, and life of a law student with. So, you can imagine again, when the move from Virginia to Texas happened, there was excitement, but also a sense of sadness of leaving what we like to call our "law school family" behind. However, God was faithful. When we arrived in the Austin area, we started going to First Baptist Church Georgetown. About the time we started attending FBCGT, the young married class started growing. It went from 4 couples to about 16 couples in a span of about 6 months. While these people did not replace our law school family, this new group brought the community we had been longing for-true community, deep community, life-giving community. It took a little longer to feel at home in Georgetown than it did in Virginia, but once we felt at home-we felt at home. So, you can imagine my dismay when Scott came to me a few months ago and said that there was a chance we would have to move to Fort Worth for his job. Leave family again? Leave community that gives life again? Pack up this house and all our stuff again? Start the pattern of moving and re-adjusting again? And I don't even want to think about the process of finding a new church and new community....
But pack up we did. Last month, we packed up, left our relationships behind, and moved to Fort Worth, Texas for my husband to accept a new job-same boss, new duties. I am proud of my husband. He is good at what he does, and I am excited to see where God takes him (and us). But I am beginning to think that this moving around is something that God is using to mold me, to shape our marriage, and perhaps, to teach me something. Perhaps he is teaching me to be all in where you are at and not to be looking for the next move or the next best thing. I tend to live a life where the grass is always greener. Then once I get to the "greener grass," I realize how good I had it back on the other side. So, perhaps this is a lesson in contentment. Perhaps it is a lesson that "home is where the heart is." Scott told me that we both need to start saying wherever we are is home-wherever we are, that is our home. We are now a family. Perhaps God is getting us used to a life of moving a lot and it is a lesson on how to move. Or perhaps we are enduring this time of apartment-hopping so that when (if) we actually buy a house and settle down, we are more grateful for our place to call home. Whatever the lesson, I have decided to sit back and enjoy the ride. The ride is not easy and some days, moving a lot can create a lonely ride with few friends. But with each other and the world at our fingertips, I think we are going to be okay.
So, the patterns of living life in a box continues. Maybe one day it will get easier, but for now, I guess I will sit back and enjoy the ride. And unpack a few boxes and try to get as settled as possible while I am at it. Hello Fort Worth, TX. Maybe this time we will stay a while...
Until next time be blessed.....
1 comment:
Amy--What a sweet and inspiring post! Like you, I remember moving often early in ministry and that I sometimes missed the blessing of where I was because I was looking ahead instead of appreciating the present. I was also concerned that I wouldn't be in one place long so I held back from friendships. It's great that you are learning those life lessons early and these are definitely days where Scott and you will grow stronger as a family of two! Blessings...I did love my short time in Ft. Worth!
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